############### # EPISODE 1.1 # ############### "School is a battlefield for your heart. So when Rayanne Graff told me my hair was holding me back, I had to listen. 'Cause she wasn't just talking about my hair. She was talking about my life." -- Angela "I cannot bring myself to eat a well-balanced meal in front of my mother. It just means too much to her. I mean, if you stop to think about, like, chewing -- what it really is? -- how people just do it, like, in public." -- Angela "My dad thinks every person in the world is having me fun than him. Which could be true." -- Angela "We'll always be able to spot you in a crowd." -- Patty, on Angela's new hair color "Lately, I can't even look at my mother without wanting to stab her repeatedly." -- Angela "I'm starting to like Anne Frank." "Is she a sophomore, too?" "No, she's dead." "Oh." -- Angela and Graham "My dad and I used to be pretty tight. The sad truth is, my breasts have come between us." -- Angela "It's just so hard to look at her. She looks like a stranger." -- Patty, on Angela "God, Chelsea Clinton. Will you look at this? No freedom, no privacy, constant surveillance, Secret Service men... That's what we need." -- Patty, to Graham "You wanna have sex with him." "Who?" "Who. Jordan. Catalano. Come on, I'm not gonna tell anyone, just admit it." "I just like how he's always leaning. Against stuff. He leans great. Well, either sex or a conversation. Ideally both." -- Rayanne and Angela "My parents keep asking how school was. It's like saying, 'How was that drive-by shooting?' You don't care how it _was_, you're lucky to get out alive." -- Angela "Listen to me... `I thought you _liked_ yearbook,' `Your room is a disaster.' Did you think I ever dreamed that I would sound like this?" -- Patty "How could Anne Frank be lucky?" "I don't know. 'Cause she was stuck in an attic for three years with this guy she really liked?" -- Ms. Mayhew and Angela "I mean, I may as well go to Bio... since I'm not all that busy." -- Angela, to Rayanne and Rickie as she leaves the bathroom to go to class "It just seems like, you agree to have a certain personality or something. For no reason. Just to make things easier for everyone. But when you think about it, I mean, how do you know it's even you? And, I mean, this whole thing with yearbook -- it's like, everybody's in this big hurry to make this book, to supposedly remember what happened. Because if you made a book of what really happened, it'd be a really upsetting book." -- Angela, to Ms. Mayhew "Seeing a teacher's actual lunch is, like, so depressing. Not to mention, her bra strap." -- Angela "This doesn't seem like a Friday." "It's Thursday." "Oh. Are you sure?" "Yesterday was Wednesday, so..." "Oh... Right." "So, that's how I know." -- Jordan and Angela's first interchange (conversation!) "I think it's the lack of meat that's destroying America." -- Graham "Why do I always have to be the mean one? Why can't you be the mean one every once in a while?" "I can be!" "But you never are." -- Patty and Graham "I think lard's my favorite food group." -- Rayanne, on the cafeteria "Cafeteria is the embarrassment capital of the world. It's like a prison movie." -- Angela "Wait, so what's fat-free?" "When something's, like, free. Of fat." "Well, what's the difference between fat-free, and like, nonfat?" -- Bathroom girls in deep conversation "You have to look tough. Somebody once set fire to my hair at Let's Bolt." -- Rayanne, on dressing appropriately for the rave "Okay, great. So, just, never speak to me again. Real mature, Angela." "No, I _want_ to speak to you. I never wanted --" "No, forget it! God, you and your hair. Did Patty, like, hemorrhage first time she saw it?" "In a sense." "Well, I have to say. I hate it." -- Sharon and Angela, the bathroom scene "That girl from the other day? That rude girl?" "She wasn't rude." "She finished my cheese. I had this brand new brick of cheese. She devoured it." -- Patty and Angela, on Rayanne Patty: "I find Rickie a little confusing." Angela: "Okay, so maybe he's bi. Who cares? His cousin can still drive." Patty: "What? He's what? Do you hear these terms she's throwing around? Bi?" Danielle: "It means bisexual." Graham: "He's bisexual?" Patty: "How can he be bi-anything? He's a child, he's obviously very confused." Angela: "No, he's not confused." Patty: "He wears eyeliner." Graham: "He does? He wears eyeliner?" Angela: "I thought you were on my side." Graham: "I'm not on anyone's side." Patty: "Graham. Grow up. Choose a side." -- A nice Chase family conversation "Oh, look at me, I'm way cool. I'm off with my way cool friends to sniff floor wax." -- Brian, to Angela "Everybody's an act. Including you." -- Angela, to Brian Rickie: "If you were about to do it, okay, what would you want the other person to say, like, right before." Rayanne: "`This won't take long.'" Rickie: "No, seriously." Rayanne: "`Do I know you?'" Rickie: "No, like, for real. Like, romantic." Angela: "`You're so beautiful, it hurts to look at you.'" Rayanne: "`It hurts to look at you?'" Rickie: "How'd you think of that?" Rayanne: "Where would it hurt?" -- Rickie, Rayanne, and Angela, outside the rave "I'll always watch out for you. Okay. I'll always be there for you, so, don't worry, okay." "I won't." "And, you know, with your hair like that? It hurts to look at you." -- Rayanne and Angela "See, it's this diary of her life. These Nazis were gonna kill her, so whatever she'd been like with her friends or her teachers -- that was over. She was hiding. But in this other way she wasn't. She, like, stopped hiding. She was free. -- Angela, to the cop "These guys started hitting on us." "What? Like sexual harrassment?" "Like guys." -- Angela and Brian ############### # EPISODE 1.2 # ############### "People throwing themselves at people is, like, _the_ basis of civilization." -- Rayanne, to Angela "I'm sorry, I forgot -- a kiss must result in intercourse." -- Patty, to Graham "I bet people can actually die of embarrassment. I bet it's been medically proven." -- Angela, to Rayanne "What I, like, dread is when people who know you in completely different ways end up in the same area. You have to develop this, like, combination you on the spot." -- Angela "What's amazing is when you can feel your life going somewhere, like your life just figured out how to get good, like, that second." -- Angela "I don't open that wide at the dentist." "How old are you?" "I don't believe this. What's your point? 15." "You act younger." "First of all, you don't know me well enough to say how old I seem. And second --" "You talk a lot." "I've said, like, eight sentences to you my entire life." -- Angela and Jordan, the Car scene "We both stopped talking. Part of his sleeve was touching my arm. I don't know if he knew. Then everything started to seem perfect for some reason. The feel of his shirt against my elbow, the fact that I still had an elbow. It was the perfect moment for him to kiss me, to anything me." -- Angela, just before Jordan lets her out of his car ############### # EPISODE 1.3 # ############### "Grownups like to tell you where they were when President Kennedy was shot, which they all know to the exact second. Which makes me almost jealous, like I should have something important enough to know where I was when it happened. But I don't yet. And in fact it was a better time then, and people knew what they were supposed to do and how to make the world better. Now nobody knows anything. We know who's popular, or that Social Studies is boring, or that Brian always has stomach trouble." -- Angela "What's the big deal? It's not like anybody even got a flesh wound. A bottle of soda was shot tragically." -- Rayanne "Everybody know there's, like, 50 guns at school at any given moment. And the fact that they haven't gone off before shows you what a totally safe place this is." -- Rayanne "Angela & Jordan Catalano _COMPLETE SEX!!!_ IN HIS CAR ... Can you believe her?" -- Note passed in Social Studies "You heard it, too? Gawd, just shoot me." "We could probably arrange that." -- Angela and Rayanne "They weren't the kind of kisses you could actually evaluate. They were introductory kisses." "You should have had sex with him." -- Angela and Rayanne "Listen, I don't know why the world's gone so crazy and I don't know what to do about it. I wish we could keep them in some kind of bubble to protect them, but you know we can't." "I'm not asking for a bubble. How about just a place where they can live, and walk to school, and become grownups without having to worry about guns and AIDS and serial murderers. That didn't used to be exotic." -- Graham and Patty "I'd hate to be that soda bottle. Splat." -- Rayanne "I mean, you're not talking it up like some low-life derelict cretin telling everyone you did her, are you?" -- Rayanne, to Jordan "Oh, that _is_ good. Put the kids in therapy so they can adjust to getting shot." -- Amber, at the PTA meeting "I can't believe this. I hate everyone." -- Angela "Well, okay, do you want my mother to call your mother and tell her you didn't sleep together?" "Aaaaaaaaaaargh!" "Well, I could do that..." -- Rayanne and Angela "Oh my gawd, I think I better change my locker." -- Crystal, in therapy "How they treating you, Bri? Baseball bats? Electrodes attached to various parts of your body?" -- Rayanne, to Brian "When I was 12, my mother gave me my sex talk. I'm not sure either of us has ever recovered." -- Angela "Mom, I'm not having sex, all right? Realy! I'm not even close. To an embarrassing degree." -- Angela, to Patty "I knew then that the rumor was right, not in actuality but in my heart because at that moment I would have done anything, I wanted him so much." -- Angela "It's amazing the things you notice. Like the corner of his collar that was coming undone, like he was from a poor family and couldn't afford new shirts. That's all I could see. The whole world was that unraveled piece of fabric. It's such a lie that you should do what's in your heart. If we all did what was in our hearts, the world would come to a halt." -- Angela, on Jordan "It's weird how something has to happen sometimes to see how you actually feel about someone." -- Angela "Could you imagine Rickie in a high-security prison? Who'd supply his makeup?" -- Rayanne, to Angela "Man, all that conversation. People writing notes. They look at you different, like trying to figure out who you realy are, like you're famous. Admit it, it's really great." -- Rayanne, to Angela ############### # EPISODE 1.4 # ############### "Are you kidding me? Hypnotized By Food could be my Indian name." -- Graham, to Rayanne "When you're not sure you trust a person any more, say a person you really trusted, say your father, you start wishing they'd do something, like, really wrong, just so you can be right about them." -- Angela "`Your federal income tax return has been selected for examination.' This is really scary. They must get Stephen King to write these." -- Graham, to Patty "Graham, she adores you. And I've got dibs on her silent contempt, okay?" -- Patty, to Graham "So, not to shock you, but your dad's attractive." "Oh, I'm sure." "Not that I'd attack him or anything, but I wouldn't leave me alone with him, either." -- Rayanne and Angela "When someone compliments your parents, there's like nothing to say. It's like a stun gun to your brain." -- Angela "Let's ignore Angela. She can't help herself. She's the product of a two parent household." -- Rayanne "Of course Rayanne's mother is going. And Heidi Fleiss is probably meeting her there, but that doesn't mean Angela should go." -- Patty, to Graham "Okay, girl with the red hair." -- Miss Krzyzanowski, to Angela "I couldn't believe that Jordan Catalano was trying actually trying to diagram my sentences. His sentences were really short." -- Angela "You know how sometimes the last sentence you said, like, echoes in your brain? And it just keeps sounding stupider? And you have to say something else just to make it stop?" -- Angela "So, my rotten day is like foreplay?" -- Patty, to Graham "Mine are probably getting a citation for, like, best penmanship on a tax return or something." -- Brian, on his parents "What's really horrible is being a witness while someone's parents order them around. It ruins the conversation." -- Angela "I'm somewhat afraid of my dad. I mean, in the past, my dad has broken down the door." "My dad always knocks." "I had a feeling." -- Rickie and Angela "Look. Your dad probably gives you stuff all the time, so it's no big deal to you. But to me, the fact that he did that... face it, I'm envious, I'm a green-eyed monster." -- Rayanne, to Angela "That's what it is to raise a girl. Walking on eggshells half the time." -- Chuck, to Patty "Gee, thanks, well, I'd like to help you, sir, but I'm too busy picturing your daughter naked." -- Graham, imagining Brian's excuse for not helping him "Smashing Pumpkins, Rage Against the Machine, Porno for Pyros --" "Oh yeah, yeah. I love their Christmas album." -- Angela and Graham ############### # EPISODE 1.5 # ############### "So, Sharon's life was developing in this natural, healthy way, while my life was, like, clogged." -- Angela "Can you give me an example of something Kafkaesque?" "Sharon Cherski having a boyfriend and me not." -- English teacher and Angela "You don't get noticed. You blend in. Unlike me, who basically never will." -- Rickie, to Angela "A potential slut. Now where do people get that kind of idea about me?" "Research." -- Rayanne and Rickie "Okay. So I have a zit. I have a zit on my chin. It's not the end of the world... exactly." -- Angela "Oh, and congratulations on the poll. Oh, you didn't know? You're on it. They _both_ are." -- Angela to Sharon "That my face is changing. That I have lines that don't go away when I stop smiling." "Oh I didn't... It's not... They don't bother me, Patty." -- Patty and Graham "He was, like, making her beg for her shoe." "Wow! I've never heard of that." -- Brian and Rickie "Okay, see, the Egyptians? They wore eyeliner to ward off evil spirits. They believed that if they outlined their eyes that the good spirits would spot them easier. I read it in a book. So that's why I tried it -- the eyeliner, I mean." "So, you believe in, like, evil spirits?" "Oh, no. I'm Catholic. Basically, I just like how it looks." "Oh, okay. That kinda makes sense I guess." -- Rickie and Brian "What are you doing here?" "Good question. I don't know. I don't have to go to the bathroom ever." -- Angela and the Supermodel "Anything causes a scar -- living causes a scar. My mother has a humongous scar from having me, does that mean that I should never have been born?" -- Rayanne to Angela "By looking in the mirror, okay? By looking at you, at the way you look at me. By the way you instruct me on how to wash my face so I don't get zits. Like you have to _fix_ me, like you're ashamed of me. You expect me to be beautiful. 'Cause you're beautiful. Well, I'm sorry, I'm not. I'm just not." -- Angela, to Patty "I, like all women, am becoming less and less attractive in the eyes of the world, more and more expendable as I get older, while you, like all men, are considered more desirable and more attractive the older you get. Of course, you'll die sooner." "That's right. [checks his watch] Well, we better have sex right now then." -- Patty and Graham "You think there's anybody in this world who truly believes they're beautiful?" "Umm... RuPaul." -- Patty and Graham "So, getting back to that _Metamorphosis_ story? It's made up, right?" -- Jordan to Brian "Sometimes it seems like we're all living in some kind of prison, and the crime is how much we all hate ourselves. It's good to get really dressed up once in a while and admit the truth -- that when you really look closely, people are so strange and so complicated that they're actually beautiful. Possibly even me." -- Angela ############### # EPISODE 1.6 # ############### "Maybe teachers have a hidden life, where they're actually, like, human. Where they have, I don't know, dignity. Or maybe not." -- Angela "That's all. Continue wasting your life." "So, um, are we, like, dismissed?" -- Vic and Sharon "So what are we supposed to do?" "Ah. I've known you all of five minute and you want me to tell you what you're supposed to do? Fine. Follow your hearts and veer away from heroin." -- Angela and Vic "You forgot to buy kitty litter again." "I thought you said you would! You know what we need? A wife." -- Graham and Patty "That was yesterday. What are you gonna write today?" -- Vic, to Angela "I want anger. I want honesty. I want nakedness." "I'm right here, baby." -- Vic and Rayanne "This will be completely anonymous." "Just how I like sex." -- Vic and Rayanne "A Fable" Once upon a time there lived a girl. She slept in a lovely little cottage made of gingerbread and candy. She was always asleep. One morning she woke up and the candy had molde on it. Her father blew her a kiss and the house fell down. She realized she was lost. She found herself walking down a crowded street, but the people were made of paper, like paper dolls. She blew everyone a kiss goodbye and watched as they blew away. -- written by Angela "Haiku for Him" He peels off my clothes like a starving man would peel an orange. His lips taste my juicy sweetness. My legs tangle with his. We become one being, a burning furnace in the cold cement basement of love. -- written by Sharon "My father decides how much cars [will work] before they're totalled. That's his job. If I drive myself and his car off a bridge, what would be the estimated damage?" -- a student's submission to Liberty Lit "When I'm a mother I'll get revenge. I'll ask questions that miss the entire point. I'll smile when you want to kill me. I'll throw away your favorite skirt and never admit it." -- a student's submission to Liberty Lit "No one knows I come out here nights. I look up to your window, but you're never there. Only your horrible dog who used to bite me. And I realize I'm not angry at you. Things change. I can forgive you, but I want to kill you." -- a student's submission to Liberty Lit "'In the cold cement basement of love.' You don't think..." "No! We don't even have a basement." -- Graham and Patty "Oh god, do you know how over my life will be when people find out _I_ wrote it?" "Do you know how over mine's gonna be when they find out I _didn't_?" -- Sharon and Rayanne, on the Poem "He's an adult I can look up to. Finally." -- Angela, to Patty and Graham, on Vic "So, is there like anyone's car you _won't_ get into?" -- Brian to Angela, as she gets out of Vic's car "Are you demented? Do you just view everything in terms of sex?" "Not everything." -- Angela and Brian "Beautiful, concise, excellent grammar, impeccable punctuation. It is a little difficult to read, of course, with this footprint." -- English class substitute #2, on Angela's Oak Tree poem ############### # EPISODE 1.7 # ############### "Love is when you look into someone's eyes and suddenly you go all the way inside, to their soul, and you both know instantly. I always imagined I'd fall in love nursing a blind soldier who was wounded in battle. Or maybe while rescuing someone in the middle of a blizzard, seconds before the avalanche hits. I thought at least by the age of 15 I'd have a love life, but I don't even have a _like_ life." -- Angela "Field trips are so intense. It's like everybody's been let out of their cages or something, and we're all roaming around." -- Angela "If only there was some button that I could just push to force me to stop talking." -- Angela "On the plus side, I met this really cute guard -- not that it at all makes it worthwhile on, like, any level." -- Rayanne, to Angela, after losing The Letter "I wrote this about someone else... Umm... I -- this guy -- I had a boyfriend last summer and um, I wrote everything -- I wanted to remember him and I -- I used your name because I, I wanted -- I didn't want other people to know it was about him, because... he died. He's dead." -- Angela to Jordan, after he returns The Letter "Pre-menopause? Is that like pre-death?" -- Patty to Camille "Actually, I play both. They say that colleges really like it if you play more than one instrument." "Do you have to play them both at once?" -- Brian and Graham "Huge events take place on this earth every day: earthquakes, hurricanes, even glaciers move. So, why couldn't he just look at me?" -- Angela, on (who else?) Jordan "Red" I was going nowhere Going nowhere fast Drowning in my memories Living in the past Everything looked black til I found her She's all I need and that's what I said I call her Red... She's my shelter from the storm She's a place to rest my head Late at night she keeps me safe and warm I call her Red... -- Jordan's song "You know those guys? Up in the mountain?" "What guys?" "Who make snow. Like, as their job." "Oh yeah." "I would realy like to do that." "You mean part time, or..." -- Jordan and Angela "When he's 40, we'll be... dead." -- Graham to Patty, on having a 3rd child "How did locking kids in their room get such a bad rap?" -- Graham "You don't know, you don't understand, not for one second. You think you understand, but you don't. You just analyze everything until it barely even exists." -- Angela, to Brian "This life has been a test. If it had been an actual life, you would have received actual instructions on where to go and what to do." -- Angela "When I saw you making out with Kyle in the hall... I mean, you act like you're reaching ecstasy." -- Rayanne, to Sharon "Sometimes I feel, like, numb or something." "Maybe you just haven't found the right person yet." "I've tried every type of person." -- Rayanne and Sharon "Why is dad playing catch with Brian Krakow?" "I guess if you live with three women, that would make any man desperate." -- Angela and Patty "Because it's never happened to you. I mean, just wait 'til it happens to you, Brian. Seriously, I cannot wait until it happens to you. Cause I am gonna look at you, and I am gonna laugh, and I'll say, `See? See? I told you so." -- Angela, to Brian ############### # EPISODE 1.8 # ############### "If Dad did die, who'd give me away?" "What?" "At my wedding." "You're so weird." "Why?" "'Cause who's gonna marry you?" -- Danielle and Angela "I felt like a really shallow person, 'cause I _was_ hungry." -- Angela "So, Girl in Distress hurls herself on Guy Without Life, huh?" -- Rayanne to Sharon, after seeing her hugging Brian "Kyle was probably her Popular Jock phase. Now she's probably moving into her Awkward But Sensitive Guy phase." "So, you're saying I'm, like, someone's phase?" "Hey. I wish I was." -- Brian and Rickie "She blames me. She thinks that I brought the heart attack on by my sexual demands. No, actually my sexual commands." -- Camille, to Patty "Brian, go inflate your tire." -- Angela, to Brian "There are so many different ways to be connected to people. There are the people you feel this unspoken connection to, even though there's not even a word for it. There's the people who you've known forever who know you in this way that other people can't because they've seen you change. They've _let_ you change." -- Angela ############### # EPISODE 1.9 # ############### "When I was little I, like, worshipped Halloween. And truthfully, part of me still does. 'Cause it's your one chance all year to be someone else." -- Angela "I wanna be someone else, but to wear, like, an actual costume to school is too scary." -- Angela "I thought she was gonna be Madonna." "She wants to be someone scary." "Who's scarier than Madonna?" -- Graham and Patty, on Danielle's costume "Wait. Who are we gonna be?" "When we grow up?" "No, at Camille's costume party tonight." -- Patty and Graham "I'm not a rat. I'm a _cat_. Hey, hands off the tail. I'm a cat, okay. Deal with it." -- Sharon "I can't believe people are walking around dressed like idiots." "I wouldn't talk." -- Brian and Angela "Does anybody know Jordan Catalano. That quesiton, like, got to me. I mean, I'd had seven conversations with him, and one really bad kiss, and one amazing one. But did I, like, know him?" -- Angela "Seems like some people have to die young. Like it fits them or something." -- Angela "I don't know. It seems like such a sick idea." "So, what's the down side?" -- Angela and Rayanne "Oh wait. Be careful. You have to wash the pants separate." -- Brian, to Rickie "Mom, Sharon Cherski and I exist in, like, two different worlds, okay. I can't just hand her a disk, okay. I mean it's just not that simple." -- Danielle, in her Halloween costume "10:00? On Halloween?" "That was very good, Danielle. It sounded just like Angela." "That was me!" -- Danielle and Patty "We'll be late." "I'll be quick. [Doorbell rings.] Not that quick." -- Patty and Graham ################ # EPISODE 1.10 # ################ "Refrigerators are so revealing. I can look in this refrigerator and know, like, everything about your family." -- Rayanne, to Angela "Who's into the mustard?" "My dad." "Well, you know what that's about. _Sex._ I mean, all you really need to survive is mild yellow. All this other stuff is purely recreational." -- Rayanne and Angela "It's not fair. My life is totally edited." -- Danielle, to Patty "Do you think it's possible to please that woman? Do you think she'd actually give anyone a brek? I mean, have you seen her vegetable bin? I rest my case." -- Rayanne, to Rickie, on Patty "I hate fondue. I'm always losing my bread." -- Angela, to Patty "Walking into someone's house for the first time is like entering another country. Not that I've ever been to another country." -- Angela "Happy birthday and maybe more. Dad." -- Rayanne's dad, in his birthday card to Rayanne "The only really great foods are appetizers and desserts, so why bother eating anything else." -- Amber "I love parties -- throwing them, going to them, recovering from them." -- Amber, to Patty "Here. Buy yourself a wig!" -- A drunk Rayanne to a frizzy Sharon "Fine, go hang with your grandparents. You can memorize all the state birds or something. [Seconds later] Hey, Angela. I'm a bitch!" -- Rayanne "To put something that large in somebody's refrigerator, without their permission..." -- Graham, in shock "You have to go where your karma takes you." "I don't think my mother really knows much about karma." "Hmmm. Maybe you can teach her." -- Amber and Angela "You know, the karma in this house is, like, ridiculous." "Really." "It's really low. Or dark. Whatever it is that happens to karma." "And I'll bet the karma at Amber's house is through the damn roof." -- Angela and Patty "I can never really enjoy myself when he's around." -- Vivian, on Chuck "How do you know whether I wish I was dead or not? Are you me? Am I allowed to have a feeling in this house, or is that just Angela?" -- Danielle, to Vivian "Sometimes I think if my mother weren't so good at pretending to be happy, she'd be better at actually _being_ happy." -- Angela "There are people in the bathroom... I don't think they're from Pennsylvania." -- Rayanne "I thought you said she destroyed her hair." "No, that was the other one." -- Aunt Libby abd Vivian, after calling Danielle's hair Pippi-esque "You can't go wrong with oregano. Oregano is a universal herb." -- Vivian, to Graham "Did you ever try to protecet someone so much that it, like, hurt?" -- Rickie, to Patty "Each card has a name: the Magician, the Empress, the Fool, the Wheel of Fortune, Strength. They represent challenges and tests, twists of fate. No card is all good or all bad. Cards can be positive or negative depending on where they fall. When you read someone's future, they must think of a quesion. They must hold it in their mind. The cards are read in sequence; each card leads to the next. We move from terror and loss, to unexpected good fortune, and out of darkness, hope is born." -- Angela, reading from the Tarot book ################ # EPISODE 1.11 # ################ "Brian, honey, are you ignoring me, sweetheart? If you are, it's okay, just tell me." "Berniece, if you left him alone, maybe he'd break out of this prolonged latency." "Our child is _not_ in latency. "Keep living in denial, Berniece. Bri, everything all right?" "Feel free not to respond." -- Brian's mother and father "My mother's a behavioral psychologist, and my father's a Freudian psychiatrist, which basically means they fundamentally disagree on, like, everything." -- Brian "At Angela's house, they probably, like, laugh and eat unbalanced meals and talk about things that don't have deep symbolic meanings. They're probably this, like, normal family." -- Brian "I became yearbook photographer because I liked the idea that I could sort of watch life without having to be part of it. But when you're yearbook photographer, you're, like, never in the picture." -- Brian "What's always amazed me is fishermen. How they wait there forever. When something finally tugs on their line they, like, don't panic. The strange this is, even though I've established verbal communication with Delia Fisher, I still think about Angela constantly. Why am I like this? I truly sicken myself. I just have to stop being her little puppet. I ove to never again show up at Angela's door with some lame excuse." -- Brian... before showing up at Angela's door "In my room, one seam's a little off and I stare at it constantly. It's, like, destroying me." -- Brian, to Graham, on wallpaper "So you're like, what, retired?" -- Brian, to Graham "Let's say you're deciding between two particular patterns, and one of them you definitely know that you really like. And the other one is nice wallpaper and all, but you're not sure if it's really..." "For you." "Exactly. But the really great wallpaper, let's say, is like totally out of your price range. So, do you take the other wallpaper, even though you don't, let's say, desire it that much? Or do you wait until the really great wallpaper is cheaper." "Well, I guess it depends on how badly you need wallpaper." "I would say pretty badly." -- Brian and Graham "Apparently Delia Fischer smiles at everyone. She probably comes from one of those small towns where everyone's friendly and smiles at you for no reason. I hate that type of town." -- Brian "There's something about my life. It's just automatically true that nothing actually happens." -- Brian "So, maybe this is what people mean when they talk about, you know, _life_." -- Brian "Ten days, no drinks, no drugs. I'm so clean you could eat off me." -- Rayanne, to Rickie "See, I have this philosophy..." "You have a philosophy?" -- Jordan and Angela "So my feeling is, whatever happens, happens." "I have to say, I really respect that." -- Jordan and Angela "Finally, an erection from actual physical contact." -- Brian, after Delia touches his hand "It's just so weird, when you've, like, chosen your wallpaper and you think you're pretty happy with it, but every time you pass by the other wallpaper, you know, the one you sort of like more?" "Brian, we're not talking about wallpaper here, are we?" -- Brian and Graham "You're right, Rickie. I couldn't possibly understand having an obsession for a person I have zero hope of ever becoming involved with. We're hopeless." -- Angela, to Rickie "It's just weird, you know, when you have a picture of how something's gonna be and it turns out completely different." "Yeah. It is weird." -- Cory and Rickie "I don't even believe in making plans. Whatever happens, happens." "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life." -- Brian and Angela "How ironic can you get without, like, puking?" -- Brian, after Angela calls him heartless "The other half is, like, you know, the tough half." "Which is?" "Which is, like, just... You know. That I belong nowhere, with no one. That I don't fit." -- Rickie and Angela "Why are you like this?" "Like what?" "Like how you are." "How am I?" -- Jordan and Angela "Her hair smelled incredible. Her hair smelled like this orange grove we passed when I was eight on my way to see my grandmother. But I guess that's just, like, her shampoo or whatever." -- Brian, on Angela's hair ################ # EPISODE 1.12 # ################ "I'm transferring out." "No, don't. Then we won't be in the same English class." "So, you never even go to English!" "Well, in case I ever do." -- Rickie and Rayanne "Where did you get Chinese food?" "Two words: Tino." -- Rickie and Rayanne "I refuse to panic just because she's happy." "Although it's alarming." "Although it's _terribly_ alarming." -- Patty and Graham "Was that your stomach or my stomach?" -- Jordan, to Angela "My whole life became, like, divided into kissing and not-kissing." -- Angela "So I tried to be invisible. It's surprisingly possible. You just sit in the back and keep quiet and let the boys shout out the answers, which they will, even if they're wrong. Boys are less afraid of being wrong." -- Angela "They look all, like, used. But in a good way." -- Rayanne, describing Angela's lips "Excuse me, have you ever been to a class?" -- Sharon, to Rayanne "We don't discuss anything. We're barely even --" "We're not even friends. Are we friends?" "No!" -- Sharon and Rayanne, to Angela "Wait. You're comparing me making out with Jordan Catalano to you getting your stomach pumped?" "You don't see the connection?" -- Angela and Rayanne "I broke up with Kyle. I have a total right to screw up my midterms." "More like an obligation." -- Sharon and Rayanne "There's something about Sunday night that really makes you want to kill yourself." -- Angela "And that creepy '60 Minutes' watch that sounds like your whole life ticking away." -- Angela "You have the option of insanity. I do not. And that makes me crazy!" -- Brian, to Angela ################ # EPISODE 1.13 # ################ (Please note... the quotes for this episode aren't all in yet. I did #14 before this one, so they're not all there. Kinda like me. Neato.) "Do you ever get obsessed with your rear-view mirror, like, while you're driving?" -- Angela, to Jordan "Can't we just..." "Just what? Do it? Right here in a parking lot?" "We're not in a parking lot. We're in a car. Why, where do you wanna do it?" "Oh, I dunno, how about my room tonight, after my parents fall asleep. We'll have to be really quiet." -- Jordan and a sarcastic Angela "Who are we trashing?" "Cynthia Hargrove's nose stud. It's too small. It's like a semi-precious pimple." -- Angela and Rayanne "Jordan used to, umm..." "Yes. Jordan used to umm her." -- Angela and Rayanne, on Cynthia "They obviously haven't ummed yet." -- Rayanne to Rickie, on Jordan & Angela "I couldn't stop thinking about it -- the like, fact of it. That people had sex. That they just _had_ it. That sex was this thing people _had_. Like a rash, or a Rottweiler. Everything started to seem, like, pornographic or something. Like, Miss Krzyzanowski had sex. So does Mr. Katimski. They both have sex. They _could_ have sex together, like right now. I am, like, the sickest person." -- Angela "We don't even know what kind of a driver he is. Not to mention..." "Not to mention... [glances at Danielle] what else we can't mention." "Exactly. He has a car. A car has doors, and seats --" "Oh, gawd." "They may aw well have their own apartment." -- Patty and Graham, on Jordan & Angela "When you said what else they could be doing, did you mean, like, foreplay?" -- Danielle, to Patty and Graham "It's a dream. I'm having a dream. I've _had_ this dream, only without the cold cuts." -- Angela, on Jordan's appearing at her doorstep in the middle of the night "Like breaking and entering?" "Just... entering." -- Angela and Jordan "You finish up whatever it is you're nibbling on in there, and _don't_ leave a mess for me to clean up." -- Patty, to Angela, unaware that Angela's midnight snack is actually Jordan Angela: "You had, like, intercourse?" Sharon: "Like, constantly!" [Cut to next scene, Patty with Angela and Danielle at the doctor's office.] Patty: "Okay, come on, Angela's next." -- Angela, Sharon, and Patty "Something's very wrong. You seem to have become 15 years old." -- Dr. Skolnick, to Angela "Why simmer when you can boil?" -- Hallie, to Graham "I may throw like a girl but I'm a financial wizard. Really. Seriously." -- Hallie, to Graham "Oh." "Oh back at you." "Is Angela here?" "Are you Jordan?" "Yeah. Are you... her dad?" "Uh, yeah." -- Jordan and Graham's conversation Brad: "So, do you have a major?" Jordan: "I don't think so." Hallie: "Oh, you'd probably know if you did." Jordan: "Yeah. I probably would have gotten a letter, or something?" -- Brad and Hallie grill Jordan "Well, I met him, your, uh, friend. He seems, you know... Well, what does meeting somebody prove?" -- Graham, to Angela "It was exactly like when I was waiting to get my flu shot. Only I didn't even get a magazine to read." -- Angela, on waiting with Jordan for their turn to umm "Fairly out of it. Not unintelligent. Sort of a stray puppy; you know the type, you're always trying to ease their pain. He may even be a half-way decent person, but let me tell you: _Trouble_. Way too gorgeous." -- Hallie's description of Jordan "Never mind. I'm just going to drop this whole subject." "Why, without running it into the ground? You?" -- Patty and Graham, on the restaurant idea "It's so tragic to see her making this whole big deal over this thing that's live over in three seconds." -- Rayanne, on Angela's reluctance to umm ################ # EPISODE 1.14 # ################ "What's wrong?" "Nothing. Just..." "You need me. You must have me. As your own. You can't live another second knowing others could possess me." "I could just kill Tino." -- Angela and Jordan "Orally fixated. That is such a cool world. 'Cause I have this, like, theory of how that probably happened to me. You see, my mother, she like claims that she breast fed me. But I just have serious doubts. I mean, you should see her boobs. They are so firm." -- Rayanne, to her drug counselor "It is like the weirdest breakup in history." -- Rickie, describing Angela & Jordan "I'm just really, like, low. I'll just find any excuse to touch him." -- Angela, on Jordan (not _on_ him, mind you) "It's like watching a roller coaster. Actually, I think they're in the ticket line, like, really close to the roller coaster." -- Rayanne to Patty, on Angela & Jordan "So, when's dinner?" "So... you're hungry?" -- Rayanne and Amber "I'm sick of appetizers. I want a _real_ meal. With all four basic food groups. And just for once, can it not be such an amazing surprise that I want to eat dinner like every other American on the planet?" -- Rayanne, to Amber "Can you imagine what that's like? To have to sit around trying to figure out what someone else is, like, thinking?" -- Jordan to Angela, on Tino leaving the band "Are either of them married yet? I mean, how much have I missed?" -- Patty to Graham, after hearing that Danielle had/has a boyfriend Patty: "If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who _is_ seeing you?" Graham: "And how much of you?" Angela: "Dad!" Graham: "Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?" -- Another Chase family conversation "Mom, I'm gonna be late for school. There are laws." -- Angela, to Patty "Why would they possibly not want me? I mean, I'm cute, I'm a total exhibitionist, and I can certainly sing just as loud and obnoxious as Tino." -- Rayanne, to Rickie "Well, I love you, too. Please... shut up!" "I will. So, you wanna make love? I mean, you know, since we're up." "Well, speak for yourself." "Well, just close your eyes and be very, very brave." -- Graham and Patty "If you mean Jordan Catalano, he's not her boyfriend. They've decided just to be friends." "[snort] Yeah, right! So, anyways..." -- Patty and Amber "So you're certain that she's not drinking?" "About as certain as you are that Angela and Cutey Pie are just friends." "Ah... I think I hea my other phone." "What a coincidence. Me, too." -- Patty and Amber discussing Rayanne "Forget a name, we're not ready!" "We'll do okay. Just wear something tight." "_That's_ your solution? Cut off my circulation?" -- Rayanne and Jordan "Anyway, that was the conversation. You know, I'll bet she doesn't even have a second phone." "So? Neither do we." "[Pause] Well, that's not the point." -- Patty and Graham "There's this thing at this coffee house Vertigo, and, like, I promised Rayanne I would ask you if I could go, but I don't even really want to go, and I feel _so_ guilty. See, she's singing with this band -- all right, fine, it's Jordan Catalano's band, but this has nothing to do with Jordan, or the fact that we broke up, or anything, that's what's so weird. It's this thing between Rayanne and me I can't even describe that's there, and it's been there for, like, a while. Since that night when you had to drive her to the hospital? It's this thing we never talk about. [Pause] So these are mine? Thanks, I was kinda low on clean socks. [Hugs Patty] Thanks for listening." "[to Patty, after Angela leaves] It's okay, she'll ignore you for a month just to make up for it." -- Angela and Graham "What are you doing here?" "What am I doing here? You, like, begged me to come." "Oh, oh, right, right. I had this fear that there would be like no audience. So I just started asking anyone." "Oh, thank you. That realy makes me feel wonderful." -- Rickie and Brian, at Club Vertigo "Listen, when she starts singing, you can't talk. But, like, afterwards? Applaud, but not too much, but, like, sincerely." "You're telling me how to applaud." "Oh, shut up, shut up. I'm sorry, I'm a little on edge. I gotta pray now." -- Rickie and Brian "Welcome to, uh, Club Vertigo open mike night. The first group is, um, called Frozen, uh, question... what is this... Embers?" "Uh, that's not our name. We're between names." "Between Names." -- Club Vertigo woman and Jordan "You know? You don't have to keep re-introducing yourself." -- Amber, to Patty "I think we could all be part of the same korass (sp?). You and Angela, me and Rayanne, and Rickie." "Part of what?" "Korass. Korass is a group of people who kind of get mixed up in each other's lives in order to do God's will." -- Amber and Patty "I guess she means a lot to you, huh?" "I guess that's like the one thing you and I have in common. Thanks for the rid, Mrs. Chase." "Rayanne? Apparently you and I are in the same korass? Call me Patty." "Patty? Thanks... for, like, my life." -- Patty and Rayanne "I can't any more! You do not know how scared I was. I thought you were dead. I was picking out clothes I should wear to your funeral!" "Ow. Rickie, that hurt." "Not enough." -- Rickie and Rayanne ################ # EPISODE 1.18 # ################ "My whole life is waiting for something to happen." -- Danielle "My life is different people kicking me out of different rooms." -- Danielle "Look. Rayanne, don't put me in the middle of this, okay?" "Hey, I didn't put you there. That's just where you are." -- Rickie and Rayanne "Mom, I've been alone with Danielle before." "Yes, and I can't help but recall the time you put her in the dryer." "Oh Mom! That was so long ago. I can't believe you're still talking about that...Anyway, she *begged* me to do it." "Who'sever idea it was, I don't want to come home and find anyone in an appliance." -- Angela and Patty "It's just going to be me and Rickie. What could possibly happen?" -- Angela "It's truly amazing. I have the power to be invisible." -- Danielle "You looked under Halli Lowenthal's hood?" -- Patty to Graham "I love sex in a different bed." -- Graham "I love sex on a different bed." -- Rayanne "Patti! I've been bad! Punish me!" -- Rayanne, impersonating a handcuffed Graham "Stab me. Somebody, please." "Don't tempt me." -- Neil and Patty "I'll explain this to you later...like when you're 30." -- Angela to Danielle "Here you've got this great job, you've got this husband and children. It must be so satisfying. Like with me, there are like so many like paths I can choose, every single possibility of life is like *open* to me. But you, your choices have been made. Your life is totally settled. It must really be like, comforting." "Yeah, it is." -- Cheryl and Patty "Oh, come on now we're adults. Do we really need alcohol to have a good time?" "Yeah!" "Absolutely!" -- Patty, Cheryl and Neil "Oh no way. No, you're not driving my car. Not after what you did to my duster, man." "That was *so* long ago. I can't believe you still talk about that." -- Graham and Neil "Oh my God! I think she's choking!" -- Rickie, reacting to Angela's laughing fit "She just fainted." "Well, not so much fainted as...swooned." -- Danielle and Rickie referring to Rayanne "Have you been here your whole life?" "Not yet." -- Patty and Warren the Innkeeper "Hey, I don't even care. I'm not interested. (Thanks. NOW I'm interested.)" -- Danielle's reaction to the group's explanation of the handcuffs "Look! I made a swan!" -- Patty to Warren "Oh honey. You said 'hooch'...in a sentence." -- Graham to Patti "Oh my God. When he walked through the door, part of his arm touched my shoulder. I thought I would faint. I mean swoon." -- Danielle, about Brian "He was a genius. I had goosebumps, just watching him think." -- Danielle, about Brian "Hey, I don't even know where the Pleasure Center is." "Don't worry. I'll show you." -- Brian and Sharon "See, he's a food SNOB and he hates anything that he doesn't cook himself." -- a drunk Patty about Graham "Ooh, Krakow. I never did it with you on top before." "Hey, can we just keep this professional?" -- Rayanne and Brian "Krackow, stop! It's too big! It won't fit!" -- Rayanne "Go to MY ROOM....Excuse me? I am an adult!" "THAT is a judgement call!" -- a drunk Patty and Warren "See, when I look at myself I see everything in like slow motion and I think, *something* has to happen. Only it never does, so I have to make it happen." "Wow." -- Rayanne and Danielle "I can't believe you! You're like this curse that's just destroying my life!...You're like this living, breathing Bad Luck omen!" -- Angela to Rayanne "I can't get it in. Wait." "Rookie." -- Brian and Rayanne "Lower, lower...higher, higher." "Ow, OW! Finger, finger!" -- Brian and Sharon, reassembling the bed with Rickie "So how was your weekend?" "Nuthin' special." "Uh...yours?" "Just the usual." -- Angela, Graham and Patty "I knew you couldn't resist." "Party pooper." -- Angela and Rayanne "Weekend from Hell." "That was the best weekend of my entire life." -- Angela and Danielle "WOOOAAH! Would you look at the size of that baby? That's a KEEPER." -- Graham, watching the fishing show ################ # EPISODE 1.19 # (These are from Kori@aol.com) ################ "In the dream I keep having about Jordan Catalano, I'm trying to catch up with him... but it's hard, because there's something wrong with the floor [shows shoes glued to the floor]. Sometimes my father's there. Sometimes my great Aunt Gertrude's funeral kinda gets mixed in with it. The end of the dream is always the same. I catch up with him. I yell and scream -- how he hurt and betrayed me, how I can never forgive him. He just stands there, like someone caught in a storm who's stopped caring how wet he gets. Then I wake up. The storm of words still pounds through my body." -- Angela "Hatred can become like food. It gives you this energy. You can, like, live off it." -- Angela "Guess what? There's like a term for me. I'm a rudimentary reader with low literacy skills." -- Jordan, to Angela "We're Residue now." -- Jordan, on Frozen Embryos' new name "Last night I dreamed that Rayanne Graff and I were appearing in this water ballet together, for, like, charity." -- Sharon "Forget the story. I can't think about some crappy story. My life sucks too much." -- Jordan, to Brian "Nothing. It's just ironic." "Well SO WHAT?.........What's 'ironic'?" "When you realize the, like, component of weirdness in a situation." -- Jordan and Brian "Ignore her. She's just a naturally happy, UP person." -- Rickie to Brian, referring to Rayanne "Oh my God. Mom, he's cute." "I told you so." "Yeah, but I can't trust your judgement of cuteness." -- Angela and Patty "A person can have feelings for someone even if they're not like, THE person anymore." -- Angela "Long, long ago. Like a fairytale." -- Angela "It's always tempting to lose yourself with someone, who's maybe lost themselves." -- Patti "I did an undefendable thing. I created my own prison, and I have to exist in it. Maybe I had a... wish... or whatever, to punish you. An unconscious wish. You've heard of them, right?" -- Jordan's speech to Angela "And then, just as I'm realizing that there's hope, that we could actually communicate -- he runs away." -- Angela "I can't even believe it. I mean, it's such like, an unfamiliar experience. I mean, do you realize how much easier my life would be, if I could just like her back?" -- Rickie to Brian, referring to Delia "There's no law that says you can't act jealous." "What? No, we don't play games like that." "I don't call it a game." "Then what do you call it?" "Considerate." -- Hallie and Graham Dear Angela, I know in the past I've caused you pain, and I'm sorry. And I'll always be sorry til the day I die. And I hate this pen I'm holding, because I should be holding you. I hate this paper under my hand because it isn't you. I even hate this letter because it's not the whole truth. Because the whole truth is so much more than a letter can even say. If you wanna hate me, go ahead. If you wanna burn this letter, do it. You could burn the whole world down. You could tell me to go to hell. I'd go. If you wanted me to. And I'd send you a letter from there. Sincerely, Jordan Catalano -- THE LETTER "Have you ever just like completely given up on someone and then something happens and you go, Oh my God. There is so much more to this person than I ever dreamed." -- Angela "I have all these dreams where I know exactly what to say. Then you tell me... you know... that you forgive me." -- Jordan, to Angela "Oh, so they're back together?" "Yup. Of course, she's still gonna die someday. We're all gonna die." -- Rickie and Brian "If you like analyze why certain people end up with certain other people it'll make you wanna KILL yourself." -- Brian "You wanna know something really....laughable? I have no friends." -- Rayanne, to Sharon "Tino? Not dependable." -- Rayanne, to Sharon "I have never met anyone like you. You will say anything, and a person can say anything to you. You're just like, nonshockable... or something. It's kind of..." "It's refreshing, isn't?" "Yeah, it is... kind of." -- Sharon and Rayanne "I screwed up." "Duh squared." -- Rayanne and Sharon "You're gay, right?" "I try not to...um...I don't like, uh...yeah, I'm gay. I just don't usually say it like that." "How do you usually say it?" "I don't usually say it. I mean, I've actually never said it out loud." "Wow, I feel kind of honored." -- Delia and Rickie "I guess I'm just sort of in the mood to have a crush on somebody where, it can't hurt too much." -- Delia, to Rickie "It's like you think you're safe or something, 'cause you can just walk away, anytime, because you don't like, need her. You don't need anyone. But the thing you didn't realize is, you're wrong." -- Jordan, to Patty "Wow. Ironic." -- Jordan, to Patty "Brian Krakow: The reason for all pain." -- Angela, to Rickie "I have to admit, that I'm somewhat jealous." "Really? Well, I'm really glad." "Me too." -- Graham and Patty "I can't believe I fell for it. It obviously a total lie." "No, I meant every word -- I mean the person who wrote it meant every word, probably." -- Angela and Brian "You liked it though, right? It made you like... happy." "Yeah." ""Cause that's probably all that, you know, matters." "To who?" "To, you know, the person... who wrote it." -- Brian and Angela